Reality +/- Surrealism? Discuss It!

Bare with me. I am about to plunge, head-first, into a truly radical concept. My perspective of shared consciousness a.k.a. “reality” took shape in my formative years; like most fellow humans I share the Earth with.
 

The average person of ‘generation X-Y’ will pursue seemingly meaningless goals. My goal is not, in any way, to undermine the corporate / industrial driven societies we have been conditioned to see as “normal”. How often do we really contemplate our actions – our consciousness, our emotions, and how these phenomenally powerful elements – particularly when working cooperatively as a unique, intelligent, and collective whole … the idea of how TRULY powerful WE are as conscious beings? Often, I find myself with thousands of questions without quantifiable and believable answers.

For example – as well-oiled and planned beings, we “instinctively” interpret the 5 SENSES. These experiences are thoroughly undeniable to human beings on a global scale. We see. We touch. We smell … and so on.

There is enough evidence to suggest that institutions (or “the man”) are suppressing up to 30 years of technological discoveries & advancements which would serve as helpful and healing – to our collective well-being. OUR well-being; as people. As mammals. Entire civilizations/ societies could, and would, prosper and cultivate enlightened morales free from wars, poverty, illnesses, corruption, or even the need or drive to squabble for scraps of food, for a barrel of oil … Ultimately, we already own the required technology, science, and materials to heal ourselves AND our Earth.

Why are we hesitant to publicize, mass-produce, or even introduce these “radical ideas” to the public? And – when I say “we”, in this particular instance, I’m not even sure who is in control of the delegation, handling, and information of such technologies. No one will say, so, again, this leaves unanswered questions. A possible explanation for the successful suppression of decades of technology (your tax dollars pay for this shit, do you care now?) … highly valuable, useful, life-sustaining achievements? Here is one (but you may not like it – tough shit):

– The ‘general population’ are formed of relatively few “high-density CNS processing / intelligence”. In other words, most people are imbeciles. Why? There are reasons for this also – originating from the same bureaucratic, indoctrinating, intimidating system which has kept US STUPID from our formative years. We weren’t given a choice. The short, sad explanation for technology suppression is the state and mood of a collective society! Not everything is some outlandish conspiracy theory. There is logic and reason behind most of the world’s unwavering demise. The problem? US! The solution? Yes, it is also US.

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The Pharmaceutical Industry

My Brain MRI – Multiple Sclerosis

Firstly, I’d like to point out that drugs can and do help some people. But, for the most part, I believe that it does a lot more harm than good. Before I start, understand that I will be candidly chronicling the past 7 years of my life.

It is an industry built on bullshit. Funded by bullshit, and accepted as truth. Well, it isn’t “truth”, and if you’re going to be a sheep packed in with the rest of the heard, good luck to ya.

This evening, I went to renew a prescription I’ve been (more or less) addicted to for about 6 years. I do not have insurance because I am a freelance writer, and although I know ALLLLL about Quebec’s “insurance”, I’d rather not, thank you (an entire other article). My situation isn’t stable, but that isn’t the point. I cannot afford to purchase an entire month’s worth of this “necessary medication” in one shot. I am single. I make money when and where I can through various writing gigs and occasional family contributions. I’m basically fucking poor. So, asking me to fork out $75-150 on meds in one shot, because the pharmaceutical company makes it “cheaper” for ME (as if – what a joke) is not feasible, let alone doable.

Let me start from the beginning – as in, when I first started “needing” shit from a pharmacy in the first place. I never needed a damn thing until I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Then, of course, being naive and scared, I agreed to a clinical trial and allowed my neurologists to start me on a drug called Avonex. It was like living HELL for 5 days. I’d feel o-k for one day, then I’d have to receieve another syringe full of poison which made me feel like shit for another week. The cycle continued for months. I hated it. The mere memory of that entire ordeal sends a shiver up and down my spine so cold and creepy that I would rather plunge myself off the Jacques Cartier bridge.

Avonex is a treatment for MS which is similar to chemotherapy. CHEMO. Does anyone see something fucked up about that? Well, I did, and I stopped. But! It didn’t stop. I started getting phone calls from other pharma companies offering me THEIR drugs. I refused. I dealt with the bit of discomfort and painful relapse … because I would NOT live week by week on a fucking drug that made me want to puke, shit, sweat, sleep, and basically die ..all at once. I said, fuck off pharma, you’re not getting this one. This one is too strong, too crazy and stubborn for your mind-fucks. And, so far, its been going pretty well.

Here is the odd part: these pharma companies WANT ME. They call me like a damn telemarketer would. They ask me personal questions. They offer me shit. I deny it. I don’t want it, or anything they have to offer.

The shitty part, is that they already hooked me on Effexor and clonazepam. I successfully quit Effexor – cold muthafucking turkey, by MYSELF – in a week. Although I still experience symptoms of withdrawal and struggle with depression, I am going to make it without their help. I don’t need it, and neither does ANY other MS sufferer (my contact info is below – any time you need a helping hand, I will be there). 

The clonazepam has been a problem for me, I wont deny it, simply because I never asked for it in the first place. I have 3 (three) neurologists. The first one prescribed it because I wouldn’t go into an MRI (claustraphobia), the second because I was having a hard time dealing with a diagnosis of multiple sclerosis, and the third – was a “neuro-psychiatrist”. The neuro-psychiatrist was my favourite. I love the clip-board doctors who got through med school with a fucking cheat sheet and their dad’s already-established status. How lovely. Anyway, I saw through this tool like a piece of rice paper, so suffice it to say it didn’t go well. I ditched our other appoitments. I hope he was pissed about it, apparently this geek takes a year to get into. Actually he was cute, but still a clip-board nincompoop. No intuition.

I continued to blow off “important” appointments, miss pysiotherapy (for what, I ain’t crippled or in some stage of denial, I have MS and feel fucking great! What is the problem?). This eventually led to the breakdown, and eventual breakUP of my long-term, 4-year relationship. I guess he saw my rebellion as me not “taking care of myself”, whereas I, didn’t give a rat’s ass what he thought. I guess I deserved it. Anyway. The past is the past.

Fast forward. I’m 30 years old, and have had one major relapse. And oh, was it a motherfucking big one. But, I survived and am alive to tell the tale. Consider this: I lived drug-free, without the aid of doctors or needles for MANY years. I had a relapse, spent 3 weeks practically disabled, then came out of it ok. The basic procedure is 4-5 days of Solumedrol (steroid) treatments, rest, and patience. That’s what I did, and it turned out quite successfully.

SO, although the pharma companies DO play a role in providing treatment, they play an even larger role in the creation, cultivation, and progression of disease in general. How and why do I know this? I am a victim of this system, and if you are going to trust anyone with what you PUT INTO YOUR BODY (some of which CANNOT be removed), trust someone who has been there and knows what the fuck they are talking about. Doesn’t that make sense?

I am including some MRI photos taken 2 years ago of my brain. The legions are still quite prominent, and apparently there are several new ones. All I can say – to anyone with a serious illness – is to distrust ANYTHING some bonehead doctor has to say, because most of them don’t really understand you.

Different Perspective - MRI - MS

 
 
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20 Things I Appreciate: November 08-10

A wise and inspiring person recently suggested something to me … an activity to perform every day. The activity seemed cliché and useless at the time, but it wasn’t. She suggested that I get up every day, meditate (I already do), then sit and physically write out 20 things I truly appreciated on that day.

Me:  Well, what if I’m in a pissy mood that day and don’t appreciate anything?

Her: You will, just let yourself go through the day, and finish the list at the end (of that day).

Me: [confused] Why do I have to meditate first and then physically write it out, rather than type it?

Her: [relaxed and amused] Because. Just try it.

[end of conversation]

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I tried this for a month and was surprised at how much more centered I felt. If I didn’t have anything or anyone to appreciate halfway through the day, I was so much more conscious of it than I had previously been. I understood after the first week why my friend said, “you will appreciate something, just wait”. This exercise helped me with two things: 1. Patience and 2. The ability to truly SEE everything around me … if I found myself feeling that there was “nothing to appreciate”, I realized how apathetic, ungrateful, and negative I was seeing the world.

 

We already have the ability to change our own attitude and outlook. Completely. We ALL have bad days and see shit in everything/ everyone we come across. No one is exempt from this. The difference will be within yourself and your own perception of ‘external stimuli’. The ability to see the GOOD, the positive, the happy, exciting, profound, inspiring … the real … will only resonate with you. The sentiment of wholeness/ oneness is a highly experience-oriented activity. Someone else will never be able to ‘tell you’ how to alter YOUR way of thinking. You have to take control. It MUST be YOU who sets the rules/ regulations … the guidelines to open-mindedness.

 

I threw a sample list of things I appreciate:

 

1. fruit

2. information

3. art

4. music!

5. life

6. humour: those who give/ receive it … can laugh with life. =)

7. creativity

8. warm clothes

9. my beautiful plants that seem to always live through shitty conditions!

10. seeing the vulnerability in everything

11. having a strong heart and mind

12. simplicity

13. forgiveness

14. understanding

15. patience

16. integrity

17. honesty

18. acceptance

19. intuition

20. gratitude

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Dr. Steven Greer’s Keynote Address in Spain

I watched this today. Impressive to say the least. Admittedly, this is a lot to digest (I actually felt nauseated at certain points). But it really is time to buckle down and deal with it.

 

 

 

Fuck off is right.

 

 

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Hollywood and Mass Media: The Rejection.

I’ve spent a lot of time studying and comparing Earthen nations & cultures. “Developed” nations are arrogant, much like the people; feeling as though we are somehow ‘better’, or aspiring to nauseating philosophies like, “everything is relative”:

(a short narrated documentary about Nairobi’s Kiberia: The largest slum in the world). I added the Kiberia doc to contrast the lives of many to life as we know it. Gluttons.

… To be in such a state of arrogance and pompousness, to truly BELIEVE that YOU have more of a right to food, indoor plumbing and clean drinking water than billions of your fellow humans? Obviously that is your choice to uphold and defend, but I actually pity your ignorance and lack of humanity. We have so much more than we need, here, or in ANY developed country. Saying something like, “well that sucks, but it ain’t my problem” just isn’t acceptable, and you damn well know it.

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Usually, Hollywood films do not interest me. Several factors play a role in my disdain of Hollywood, and the scheme of the entire ‘beast’, which can never seem to eat enough … to get HUNGRIER rather than more peaceful. Bigger portions. More expensive accoutrements which serve to temporarily capture the human imagination. In short, Hollywood films are aesthetically pleasing, but fail to offer any truth or variation. The guy always gets the girl in the end. The monster is always defeated, but never without a painfully unintelligent succession of modern predictability.

These visual eyesores, each one more insulting than the last … with bigger, brighter, louder, slimmer, less human, more of this/ that & the ‘other’ … is essentially the exact same story told over and over again. Slightly different plot and appearance, but THE STORY IS THE SAME. To be totally honest, I grew tired of the acceleration of affects and became resentful. Corporate executives are exploiting true artistry; which is what each and every human is, in essence. We are ALL creators, and have the gift of varying, strong emotions with which to interpret, reconstruct, reCREATE, and reform … in all facets of life.

Hollywood does not give the person an opportunity to really think. Why? Our most true and basic senses are ‘preyed upon’, and while yes, you may “ooooh and ahhh” at Peter Jackson’s monstrosities (I do too, I am NOT “special”), there isn’t a lot of truth or variation from the ‘main objective’: to entertain you. Entertainment is healthy. It gives us a break from the monotony of life; but why should life be so repetitive in the FIRST PLACE? As humans, our imaginations are SO powerful and full of potential, that I see NO reason for any type of routine or consistency! This is a simple observation of my fellow humans. We have SUCH a phenomenal range of emotions, fantastic ideas, brilliant concepts, and truly engaging discourse.

Is there something inherently “wrong”, with simply wanting to be entertained? Frankly, yes, and that will offend many of you. Perhaps we need to be “offended” to truly realize how disgusting, greedy, selfish, and STUPID we’ve become. We have allowed this to happen through laziness, apathy, and complicity. I don’t want to be a human ‘doing’. Consuming everything and anything I can, listening to everything a “trusted member of society” claims I SHOULD. This manipulation of Us, as a whole, needs to be rejected. Do you really want to be written off as a dim-witted neanderthal without the ability to think for yourself? Do you want your lineage to remain trapped, enslaved by corporations who think you’re an animal?

Why does it seem wrong to chase ‘entertainment’? I shouldn’t even have to explain this. Just open your eyes, for real, and look around in every direction. You are the product of a system which never truly fulfills you. What does? LOVE. Passion. Humanity! Totally unscripted. Naked human feelings and ‘drivers’. You may be temporarily pleased with a job or project … but it never lasts, becomes mundane, and ends up feeding a beast which offers little in return.

Have you ever pondered the evolution of human existence? REALLY allowed yourself to be totally introspective, and to deeply contemplate who the hell you are? Perhaps each of us should. Sadness or depression are not factors for me anymore; when you get to the root of this entire existence (which NO ONE can properly or believably explain) … The Truth becomes of utmost importance in every decision one makes in life.

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Something Beautiful for the Day

The terrestrial planets: Mercury, Venus, Earth...

Image via Wikipedia

I don’t think we take adequate time to appreciate and honour what a truly beautiful world we live in. Yes, I am all-t00-familiar with the negativity circulating on our Earth; daily news brings tales of death and destruction from the furthest reaching corners of the globe.

Comparison of the sizes of Uranus and Earth.

Image via Wikipedia

Right now, in this moment, there is very little we can do to change this atrocious – and humourously predictable – sequence of violence, corruption, and ‘imminent danger’ … seemingly lurking behind every corner, awaiting some imaginary time to arrive and *boom*: we’re all fucked. Right?

But what about the positivity? Who pays attention to the wondrous elements of beauty and positivity which ALSO surround us? We are so conditioned to struggle; to attempt survival inside an imaginary system of control and corruption which offers no hope or truth.

Today, I want to celebrate some of the blessings, that we as Human beings, have received from the Universe. I want to feel totally alive and awake today, and say, “fuck off” to that which would attempt to suppress the human spirit. It is in all of us, but it is up to each and every individual to FIND that spark of life; that glimmer of hope and love which has so much potential for change in every aspect of our existence. We are one – individualism is only important when you’re still seeking the core of your soul; your heart. Unconditional love seems impossible because we cannot accept ourselves … our own weaknesses and flaws – but be assured – they are there regardless. We must learn to love each other for exactly who we are, and appreciate the potential in every form of life.

Blue Marble composite images generated by NASA...

Image via Wikipedia

I also wanted to include some videos that have greatly inspired me.

Videos

Solar System Planets.

Image via Wikipedia

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Seeking Truth and Purpose

… This is an existential crisis of nauseatingly epic proportions, consequences, and tireless efforts for many of us. It can also be exhilarating; freeing and beautiful.

It is not an easy path in life, and that is exactly what it becomes: the path of one’s entire life. When one takes that very first step towards actively pursuing answers to the important – perhaps THE most important – unanswered speculative questions of this thing we call “life”, it isn’t uncommon that a total consumption of a person’s mind, heart, consciousness, and energy is devoured. This search, from what I’ve seen so far, is not a “search”, but a commitment of one’s humanity; strength and resourcefulness are tested and pushed at every twist and turn. With each new piece of information, however seemingly insignificant, can sometimes weigh heavily on a novice or ‘student’ of new enlightenment.

What is Enlightenment? Is there an ultimate purpose or benefit?

Yes, in short, but the path is uncertain and exhausting. We, as human beings of Earth, are not conditioned from adolescence to express freedom of thought and ideas; we are not encouraged to follow our innermost desires and true ‘gut feelings’ (intuition). This is what makes us HUMAN. Otherwise, what are we? Without the ability to create independently and without instructions? The supreme freedom to love one another without fear? The lack of dogma, cultural prejudices, authoritative oppression, racial biases, and limitations of our human potential through control of every facet of our lives? Imagine what life could be without these horrible human illnesses – which is exactly what they are: mind-controlled illnesses we had no say in from birth, and very few have the ability to shed completely. To consciously say to one’s self, “none of this makes sense to me … why do I do this/ that? Who am I? What is all of this crap that I am pressured to do, to buy, to devote myself to without any idea (really) why? Why does my soul feel there is a void? Why do I feel so confused and nearly crippled with oppressive rules of an artificial monetary system, religion, and “love” that doesn’t really feel like LOVE should feel”?

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